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From: "New in Political Stickers, Buttons and Shirts" <retorts@irregulartimes.com>
Subject: New Bumper Stickers, Shirts and Buttons from Irregular Times (June 21, 2011)
Date: June 21st 2011

New Political Bumper Stickers, Buttons, Magnets and Shirts
from Irregular Times

The following are the latest additions to our extensive line of political bumper stickers, buttons and sweatshop-free t-shirts. Keeping track of these designs is a great way to follow the political zeitgeist.

Is there a design you'd like to see us add to our catalog and make available for sale? Send your suggestions to retorts@irregulartimes.com.
Honk if you've HAD IT with Rachel from Account Services Bumper Sticker

Hello, this is Rachel from Account Services. There's no problem with your account, but... How many times have you been summoned to the phone for this nonsensical, obvious attempt at pulling you into a scam? Do these people not realize that once you've heard the message, oh, a DOZEN times, you'll just hang up the phone anyway? I think this is a hint as to the actual nature of Rachel. I think she is a robot from the planet Ecktron-7. Curse you, Rachel from Account Services, and curse your army of robotic telecommunications invaders!
Pardon me, but your Security is standing on my Freedom Button

Your mania for increased security, driven by your irrational fear, is standing on my freedom. It's not based in reality. Get it off, and get off it! (Button against our current Homeland Security mania)
There are Days when I Say One Term is Enough Barack Obama Button

Barack Obama says: there are days when I say one term is enough. Liberal America says: Same here. As tired as President Barack Obama might be of having to listen to people all day, the liberal Americans who elected him are tired of Barack Obama NOT listening to them. With all the broken promises, downright double-crosses and policies that are as bad as or worse than Bush's, liberals ask themselves why it would be a good idea for Barack Obama to have more than one term. (Liberal button disparaging the disappointments of the Obama administration)
Mothers Against Michele Bachmann

As she runs for President in 2012, Rep. Michele Bachmann says she speaks for women, but her extreme politics run counter to the voices of moderate and liberal women across the country. Mothers in America overwhelmingly want their kids to grow up in a land that values tolerance, peace, learning, freedom and wisdom. Michele Bachmann values none of these. That's why you are one of many, one of the Mothers Against Michele Bachmann. (Anti-Bachmann bumper sticker)
Marriage Equality for All Bumper Sticker

A man and a man. A woman and a woman. A woman and a man. Whosoever is brought together by a commitment of love into the bond of matrimony should be cherished equally in society's eyes. Embrace love in all its forms with this bumper sticker advocating marriage equality.
Marriage Equals Love Plus Love bumper sticker

Exactly how is anybody's marriage affected a gay or lesbian couple who share a life together down the street? How can keeping committed partners apart make anyone else's marriage happier? Marriage is two hearts together. Marriage equals love plus love. That's the equation that makes the world go round. (Marriage equality bumper sticker)
Krampus for President Campaign Button

Although he was not able to attend the June 2011 presidential debate due to prior commitments to toss naughty children into the river, 2012 contender Krampus had nothing but disdain for participant Michele Bachmann. She's only prepared to wreck the United States gradually, Krampus insisted, committing to destroy the nation at once should he be elected. Is that your idea of action? Then vote Krampus for President. That's real change!
Krampus Silhouette T-Shirt

The mythological antihero of the Christmas season in Europe, Krampus travels alongside Saint Nick to deliver a switching to naughty children, or perhaps even a trip to the woods or a bracing stream. Most of your friends and neighbors haven't heard of Krampus yet, but they will. Show your savvy when you wear this shirt of Krampus in silhouette against a field of green (made ethically by American Apparel).
Rick Santorum is fake, Global Warming is real bumper sticker

Despite volumes of scientific evidence, Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum has declared that global warming is junk science. Does Rick Santorum know what he's talking about? (No.) Mr. Santorum, global warming is real. You're the fake. (Anti-Santorum global warming bumpersticker)
Krampus Dancing with a Top Hat Bumper Sticker

Hier kommt Krampus! Vorsicht? Nein! If you look closely at images of the Germanic Krampus figure, the aspect of vengeance against naughty little children is balanced with a mischievous sense of glee and fun. With that side in mind, we give Krampus a kicky countercultural makeover by putting his figure in a technicolor line, dancing with top hats extended and birch switches extended not unlike a jaunty cane. Grus vom Krampus! (Rainbow Krampus bumper sticker)
To End Medicare, Just Vote Republican bumper sticker

If you want to end Medicare, if the idea of health care for senior citizens is offensive to you, then figuring out what to do is not exactly rocket science. It's easy. Step 1: Vote Republican. Step 2: Let the Republicans do what they do best. Et voila! No more medicare.
On War, I Stand With Sam Farr Bumper Sticker

In a June 2011 speech, Sam Farr reminded us all that war doesn't work. His words: In order to achieve long-lasting peace and stability, we need to lead by example and look past the sword for solutions. As lessons in Afghanistan and Iraq have taught us, military action alone is not a winning strategy for long-term security and peace. Hearts and minds are not won over by tanks and bombs. Instead, they are won by engaging local populations and offering resources that uplift entire communities. I stand with Sam Farr.
Mitt Romney Flip Flop Bumper Sticker

Mitt Romney moves so fast from one position to another that political scientists attempting to observe his behavior have only recorded a suggestive blur. Good god, man, pick an idea, decide if it's the right one, then STICK with it! None of this flip-flopping around to try to mimic the fashionable Republican notion of the minute. It's so unbecoming a president, so embarrassing. Let's make a deal and NOT elect Mitt Romney president, m'kay? (anti-Romney bumper sticker in flamboyant yellow to match Mitt Romney's flamboyantly perfect coif)
Atheism Periodic Table of the Elements T-Shirt

Astatine. Helium. Iodine. Samarium. Put these elements together in Periodic Table shorthand and you've got AtHeISm. Now that's one heck of a compound. This design makes a point that the sharpest of your peers will appreciate -- that there is a close relationship between science (the application of methodical observation to develop understanding) and atheism (the absence of faith in God). This t-shirt is made ethically in the USA.
Primary Barack Obama 2012: Democrats Deserve a Choice Bumper Sticker

Given Barack Obama's many backtracks and broken promises as President, it's only fair that Democrats voting in the presidential primaries of 2012 be given a democratic choice. In 2012, we need to Primary Barack Obama (liberal outrage bumper sticker).
Shut Down Guantanamo Bumper Sticker

The military base at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba is a place where people are sent to be held outside the confines of the justice system, outside charges, outside trials, outside the constitution of the United States of America. It is part of our own Gulag Archipelago. Hundreds of people later found to be innocent have been stripped of their rights and dignities for years without recourse. Enough. This is not what America stands for! Shut Guantanamo Down! (anti-Guantanamo bumper sticker)
Big Brother is Watching You Bumper Sticker

Under George W. Bush, Under Barack Obama, under presidents that follow the national security state has expanded enormously with a broad and deep array of surveillance technologies deployed to scrutinize individuals in their daily activities. You are being watched, and Big Brother is Watching You. That you is plural as well as singular, so spread the word and let people know they should do something about it. (Bumper Sticker against Big Brother)
Kill Your Cell Phone Bumper Sticker

Do you remember the phrase Kill Your Television? Well, now it's worse: the broadcasting gadgets are little and they're everywhere. Those smartphones are getting far too smart, and some day in the not-too-distant future they'll be in charge of us instead of the other way around. Or has that day already arrived? Rise up and assert your independence. Don't just turn your cell phone off. Kill it.
No to Torture, No to Mitt Romney bumper sticker

During the 2008 presidential campaign season, Mitt Romney went out of his way to lecture John McCain on the subject of torture, then declared that he'd like to see the U.S. Government use water torture against more of the people it has detained without trial. Is this the America you remember? Is this what you want America to be? Say no to torture. Say no to Mitt Romney for President.
The Patriot Act is Baloney! (Homeland Insecurity Bumper Sticker)

The USA Patriot Act is an unconstitutional instrument of paranoid surveillance without warrants, filled with and spreading a corrosive distrust across the United States of America. It is poison to our nation. Enough. Call it like you see it: the Patriot Act is Baloney! (Bumper Sticker Against the Patriot Act)
Voting Republican is Like Shooting Yourself in the Foot Bumper Sticker

As Gylliwyn says, unless you're a trigger-happy Millionaire gunning for gain, voting Republican is like aiming to shoot yourself in the economic foot! Remind your GOP-voting neighbors that no matter how much they harp on social issues, it's the economy, stupid -- and we're not so stupid that we haven't noticed. (Anti-Republican bumper sticker in oval shape on deep field of blue)
Krampusnacht T-Shirt for the December 5 Holiday

Krampusnacht is the traditional Night of Krampus in Europe, a time when this winter solstice spirit runs amok with gleeful abandon, weeks before he is paired with Saint Nick for a chained and repentant delivery of presents. Join him on the streets of your town for a Krampuslauf, wearing this shirt and explaining to passersby what it all means.
Trump-Palin 2012: You're Fired! and I Quit! for America bumper sticker

What's the Republican party ticket for the presidency that most strongly captures the absurdity in GOP politics? How about Donald Trump for President and Sarah Palin for Vice President? He can yell You're Fired! and she can scream back I Quit! Then we all can move on to some better alternative, right? (Trump-Palin 2012: a real bumper sticker for a mock ticket)
Dated Darcy, Married Wickham Jane Austen bumper sticker

Invert Jane Austen's sensibility with this edgy literary bumper sticker. Yes, Darcy was a man of propriety, but let's face it: he was stiff and diffident and awfully dull. Those of us who want to live life with a bit of excitement go with Wickham. (Pride and Prejudice bumper sticker)
What do Democrats and Republicans Want? Bumper Sticker

What do Democrats want? Fairness for everybody. What do Republicans want? More, more, more for themselves. What do you want? (Bumper Sticker on Republicans and Democrats in America)

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